Mental toughness

You know, The Tough Guy wasn’t always so tough. Decades of experiences, and events, and tragedies shape us into the people we are. A product of the society we choose to live in. Some hoods are all about eat or be eaten. Others are comfy, giving hoods that watch out for, and help each other.
The formative events of childhood, for me, riots, all day concerts, streakathons, Buffalo football, cross country running, Flagstaff mountain 4 times a week, are eclectic at best. Growing up in the tough hoods of Boulder, Colorado? Before Boulder was PC? Yea, I’m a cowboy, baby. And a rocker. And a bad boy! Watching my dad get taken away by the bottle, only to come back ravaged by cancer, eventually dying from the cure. The last of 4 kids, the object of hateful drinken abuse, to be the only one of the adult children there when he died. Best friend murdered. Recovered addict for over 20 years. Asshole addict for 14. Single parent with independent 20 year old son. The biggest part to not being depressed is to go do something. Hard to do when you cant afford to even eat. Hey, at least I lost that couple inches on the waist. Lol. Times were really tight in 2010. Paying off a supid risky margin call has hurt me for 4 years. Almost done with it, but lost a great woman due to it, and that, my friends is the rub. That stupid trifecta of lonely, broke, and hungry makes a pretty depressing sight. I thank my friends for getting my ass out of the house and invites to dinner. That kept me from going over the edge. Necessity has forced me into action. Action has increased my interest. And interaction has started a new attitude. The last few weeks have been engaging, busy, not always fun, but rewarding. The Tough Guy is tired in a good way. His hands are a little torn up. He is a lot dirty. But at least he is WARM!! Financial planning meeting in 2 hrs. I think the annuity hss come of age. Gotta keep the busy streak alive. Thinking maybe snowshoeing at Bear Lake. Or Walker Ranch. I do know that prepping for my resolution needs to start in late February. More on that next time,,,,

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